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REVIEW: Cinderella

There's an exchange between Camilla Cabello's Cinderella and Billy Porter's "Fabulous Godmother" in the Cinderella adaptation that hit Prime Video this week that caught my attention. When Cinderella asks her Godmother how their magic is supposed to work, Godmother replies by telling her, "Let's not ruin this incredibly magical moment with reason." 

It's a very ironic quote within this particular rendition of the fairy-tale. One that has no trouble sabotaging its own magic with ... maybe not "reason," but a modern sensibility that seems so insecure about fairy-tales to begin with.

Boy does this movie want you to know it's not your grandma's Cinderella. This movie bolsters Cinderella's resume by giving her an "aspiring businesswoman" plotline. This addition, while subtle as a firework, is less intrusive than other storytelling decisions that keep the story anchored in 2021. Yes, this movie includes rats making penis jokes. Get ready to be swept away to the enchanting realm of your junior high homeroom ...

I don't even know if I was missing the classical escapism intrinsic to other recent adaptations like Brannagh's 2015 remake or 1998's Ever After. Mostly I was just hungry for an emotional connection with any of the characters, a connection this movie frequently passed on in favor of shorthand plot elements. The poor provincial town that frowns on innovators. The king who just can't understand why his son wants to follow his own path. The king so impressed with the size of his crown that he neglects his family and especially his wife. (The king is just in general an unlikable dude.) None of these plotpoints have any texture, and all of them are conveyed through the most expository of dialogue. I guess when you think feminist Cinderella is itself revelatory, you don't feel the need to bring anything actually new to the table.

Cabello's Cinderella isn't so much motivated by kindness as she is by confidence. Graciously this version recognizes that the two virtues are not mutually exclusive. Even girlboss Cinderella earns favor with her Godmother through an act of kindness that is very on-brand for a fairy-tale princess of any era. Cabello herself plays a Cinderella who is altruistic, confident, and even funny. The rare crumb of true progressive-thinking this film affords the princess is the privilege of being truly multi-dimensional.

But wait, one might say, maybe this team wasn't trying to make a traditional Cinderella retelling. 

I don't doubt it, but when you're playing with a market as oversaturated as Cinderella remakes, you'd best have a new insight to bring to the table. It's not even as hard as it sounds. Sometimes it's enough just to have well-developed characters, but again this movie struggles to do even that much. (They try giving Stepmother some backstory at the eleventh hour, mind you, but it's a little too late.) This movie has no insight of its own, but rather tries to coast on the hope that you agreed that, yeah, those other Cinderella pics just weren't hip enough, were they? 

This movie's not half as egregious as Shrek, I'll give credit where it's due, but it's not enough to set out to make a new Cinderella with the sole vision of making it not traditional. When you're defining a movie purely by its negative space, the end result is appropriately hollow.

                        --The Professor

Comments

  1. Boy, you nailed this one on the head! 100% agree. Particularly with your summerial declaration: "it's not enough to set out to make a new Cinderella with the sole vision of making it not traditional." Very well put!

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